Hi, my first nicotine free day started on 05 August 2011, so this is day 13 for me.
I have been coping very well so far. I have had two serious craving episodes where in the end i just had to switch myself off and go and lay down for a short nap on the couch while it passed, but i wont always be in the position to be able to do that. I’m very conscious of my behavior and am noticing how i cruise through the day only briefly taking a moment to remind myself that i don’t smoke anymore, then out of the blue something switches on or off in my brain and suddenly i am hell bent on wanting a cigarette. I can see how irrational my thoughts become. It’s scary when cravings come out of the blue because i just don’t know how well i will be able to rationalise the craving each time. My greatest fear right now is that i will be in a random moment and suddenly find myself with a cigarette in my mouth justifying that it is my right to smoke if i want to.
I am 39. I have smoked for the most part of the last 24 years. I have quit many times before. The longest time i have ever been able to stay quit for is exactly 2 years. I have quite a history of quitting smoking but relapsing within weeks or months even years.This has made it harder over time to want to try to quit again, as i think 'well what's the point' all the hard work takes place and i think i've got this addiction kicked then something happens and i'm having an uncontrollable craving and i am not prepared for it anymore and i smoke again. It's soul crushing to know how much hard work it took to be smoke free for so long only to have it ruined (by me) in just 10 minutes or less of irrational brain logic.
I quit this time thinking that i've just had it with smoking. I just don't want to be a smoker anymore and haven't wanted to be a smoker for a long time now. I figured that i've got a lot of quitting experience behind me, i can learn from my past mistakes i would just take it day by day but this time i was going to learn more about addiction and nicotine and try to solve this riddle once and for all. That's when i found the whyquit website. It is so informative and it has the sort of information that i've been looking for to help me in the long term to make this a permanent quit. (so thankyou to the people at whyquit - especially joels library and the personal stories). I pop in from time to time and read another article here and there. I find reading quitting information keeps me on my toes and keeps me inspired. I try not to come here when i’m craving because i think i need to deal with my cravings my own way and trying not to use anything else as a replacement or crutch. It is hard in that respect but will be worth it in the long run.
I am also looking forward to reading other peoples stories and journeys on this forum and think the experience gathered together here will be very valuable to me.
Anyway thanks for listening/reading and i wish you all the best with your own challenges.