Hi Nancy,
I'm so glad you posted. Your story really hit home and started me thinking about some things:
I too, smoked for 35 yrs., numerous quits numerous ways.
I had the strength & perseverance to change some horrendous situations in my life for the better but when it came to being a non smoker I thought maybe it just wasn't in the cards for me.

Being a non smoker was a dream of mine I thought I would just have to write off cause I was getting too old (57 yrs. old). I thought maybe it was too late for me & I would console myself with the thought that I had done a lot for myself over the years & I could concede this one last dream of mine.

Then after lurking around whyquit.com for a week & reading, I had the best awakening ever: There was absolutely no reason on earth keeping me from becoming a non smoker except for myself! I was the only one keeping my dream from coming true!!!!

Hello in there, Lou! So what if you are 57 years old....that doesn't mean you are dead! (but you sure could be soon enough, if you don't quit playing Russian Roulette!)

Hello in there, Lou! So what if you relapsed numerous times before? You choose junkie thinking then. Now you can choose educated thinking !

The lights turned on: YES, I CAN DO THIS, YES, I WILL DO THIS and YES I AM DOING THIS!

The truth is, I have grown stronger over the years,
How could I think I wasn't strong enough when I had successfully accomplished undoing damage from an abusive childhood?
To quit smoking, was only talking about 72 hrs-2 weeks!
Why would I think I couldn't achieve this dream too?
Why would I buy into remaining a victim in this area of my life?
"Junkie thinking" that's why!

Of course my addiction wants to keep me enslaved and have all the control. My addiction won't allow dreams that don't include nicotine ! Nicotine planned on taking my life before it would let me go off with out it! Gosh, how was it going to get fed if it set me free? (ask me if I care...not anymore I don't)!

Hello in there, Lou! Why have you quit persevering? Why have you given up your rights to a better life! Why do you continue to choose to remain Nicotine's victim of enslavement?
Hello in there, Lou! Nicotine is a powerful addiction BUT you have learned you can take back the control here & put this addiction into remission!.

What kind of sucker have I been to agree to do demand feedings for 35 years (that would be about 511,000 feedings !)
I had gotten tired of demand feeding my babies after 6 months.... those feedings were free of charge, taboot!
How could I have gotten so duped into sacrificing my dream for a normal smoke free life?
Understanding the Law of Addiction has set me free.
Accepting the Law of Addiction gives me the choice to live my dream of a smoke free life.

Hang in there Nancy and hang onto your quit.
You owe it to yourself to never loose this quit.
I have found it to be soooooo worth it (even with the challenging days in there)!
A journey I gladly embrace as I set myself free to follow my dream of living a nicotine free life!
This will be your last quit!, as you take one day at a time and never take another puff!

Lou
52 days free and healing
Said "good riddance" to 2,093 nicotine feedings
Saved $366, (rather than torched with the flick of a Bic!)