YESTERDAY QUIT METER FLASHED
imageDOUBLE GREENimage
WOW!! That is really an achievement as I smoked for over, 40 years. I had been ready to quit for a long time, tried varous ways, set quit dates, got the supplies advised by professionals. You know-those patches, gums, lozengers and pills. Well, none worked for me and finally I realized I was foolish to want to stop being a nicotine addict and then put this stuff in my body, IT WAS NICOTINE TOO. You know I never realized that stuff had nicotine in it. I just took the advice on fact value and the standard theory from all the "professionals". But all the people I know who had quit and more importantly whose who stayed quit, did it COLD TURKEY. That was when I found FREEDOM AND WHYQUIT.COM and where I found the help I needed. I've read the stats above, but feeling is different from reading and understanding after my many years of smoking I know it will take a longer time to heal......dauh!!!
As HAPPY & PROUD as I was to see the 60 day quit on my meter (thank you managers for that wonder display), I've had some regression thoughts lately. Not about going back to those old days as a nicotine addict, never that again, but thoughts of something....wanted....lacking...needed...different????
Then I realized this new life of mine is still a work in progress. A new stronger, healthier me, sure....I keep telling myself...The green display from the managers was really better than a birthday gift and speaking of birthdays, maybe because one is looming for me thats why I've been having some bad days lately, getter older...boo-hoo, time passing me by...junking talk-me thinks...Or maybe it will be the first birthday free of nicotine???? I've come so far and I never want to go back. I had hoped for an easier time now, I felt better at 1 month, yes junkie thoughts? Everyone is different I do know and this is a milestone for me to just enjoy and hold on to.image
The weather is changing too, fimiliar fun filled activities remembered all took place around this time of the year. Time to hike up the mountain and count Hawksimage yes, thats it, I remember all those GOOD TIMES with friends on the mountain..............memory triggers perhaps?? Those were times I didn't smoke, well sure in the car, never on the trail.(former fire service gal) I had expected to have fewer thoughts of "the old days of smoking" by now, I thought I'd be stronger, thought I'd be past this "somethingmissingthoughts".....Physically I'm better than ever, cough is gone, breathing is so.........easy now, energy is up, I eat and sleep as a non-addict now and even teeth are white again. Sure have gained a few pounds...well maybe more than a few...but I can work on that too.
Sorry to ramble on , do need to get it out more here and need more colors in my posts for cheering... Thanks again for all here, you have helped me with your posts, we do read them, mine and yours too. I know/feel this is really the most important decision of my life and I will continue to go forward...Just need to let go on paper....On the whole I feel GOOD....I just want to feel GREAT!!!
Star, I have stopped nicotine for 2 months, 2 days, 2 minutes and 18 seconds (64 days). I've not smoked 640 death sticks, and saved $162.67. I've saved 2 days, 5 hours and 20 minutes of my life.