I have often tried to explain to people what the fear of success means, but it is rare that anybody outside this forum gets it. To want and fear the same thing (quitting), makes no sense on the surface. Welcome to nicotine addiction and wanting to quit.
My life was built around cigarettes. Nothing else mattered, not family, not work, not friends, nor society. Unfortunately they all suffered due to my short sightedness and amazingly they all stuck with me even though I leaned on them heavily.
While riding around in my smoke free car today, thinking about this post by Beavis I realized I probably have close to a million and a half nicotine hit memories stored up in my head. 20 per day/20 years/10 hits per delivery device...Thats 1,5000,000 memories of AAAHHH?~~~~~Scary~~~~~~
Would you believe they have all but disappeared after 4 months? BELIEVE IT. The Gold members will say I have no idea what comfort is at 4 months, but I'm telling you it gets real sweet in a hurry. It gets fun basking in your efforts of quitting. No longer a slave to the nicotine clock, or certain mile markers along the road to work, or filling up the nicotine tank before a long plane ride.
I found my FREEDOM and never letting go!


4months 1week 1day19:56 smoke-free, 2,579 cigs not smoked, $515.80 saved, 1w 1d 22:55 life saved