Lucie -  great job on quitting smoking.  I can relate to having fantasies about having just one "nice" cigarette but know that the fantasy is really a fantasy.  If I have one, I will eventually go back to smoking them all and then I have this disgusting habit back in my life.  I was not a closet smoker but did try to hide my smoking from a lot of people who didn't know me very well.  It made me feel ashamed and dishonest and my smoking made me feel dirty because it is a filthy, smelly habit.  I don't want to smoke anymore.  There is nothing good about it.

When I want to smoke a do deep breaths.  I also look on this website.  I also look over and over at my reasons for quitting smoking.  There are lots of them and I add to the list over time.  The only reason to smoke is to get rid of the urge which is just going to come right back soon after I put the cigarette out.  In other words, it is a vicious cycle and the only way out is to stop for good.

You are doing great!  Hang in there.  I struggle too.