okay, i´m a newbie, this is only my first week, but i do want to get a little something into this string, since i do agree that this is the core of freedom, and the core of our definitive quits here. actually this has to do with another concept - the "one day at a time" - and this conversation i had today with a friend who is a permanent withdrawal-addict, since she smokes a couple of cigarettes everyday. i was actually telling her how my commitment to "never take another puff" makes it easier for me to deal with my craves. since i know i will "never take another puff", why bother with entertaining the thought of a crave, why even think about it? well, she then mentioned that that wouldn´t work for her, that she can´t think in terms of "never', that she has to take "one day at a time". well, that´s when i saw the dual aspect of this question. it has to be one day at a time, it has to be manageable, specially during crave crisis, but it has to be forever. that commitment to not relapsing, that certainty of not wanting to go through withdrawal again has to be there. i tell you i can hardly wait for the time when i´ll go through a week without thinking of cigarettes. truth is i can´t be sure that it will come, but i´m going to believe in it, and i´m going to work for it. how? with the red hot adherence to my commitment, and the support of my family at freedom. to tell you the truth, it even crossed my mind not to post, not to write, not to access the site, not to think about this anymore, just forget about cigarettes, forget i was ever an addict (i still am, right?).....but that would be simply fooling myself, and that´s exactly what my quit is all about - STOP FOOLING MYSELF, and i´m afraid i have to agree that relapsing is fooling yourself, and that´s why i also agree and believe that members don´t relapse, or else, you´re still playing games - and you´re not even playing with the members or staff on this site - i´m afraid you´re merely playing with yourself. i´m so thankful (yeah, yeah....so maybe i could have done some other way, but i didn´t) to my support family at freedom that i can only understand, feel, and take to heart the premise that relapsing without posting is a slap in everybody´s face. well, i wouldn´t do that. and since i´m sure that reading and waiting for the support would stop me from relapsing, i haven´t felt the need to aske for help yet. maybe i will - i know i will if it ever comes to that. but all i really wanted to say is that to me it´s absolutely crystal clear that the commitment to non-relapse is the key, and that´s why once you´ve become a member that option is simply not available. fernando.