On Feb 11, it will have been two months exactly since I've quit. I CANNOT believe that after almost two entire months, I am having such strong and such
lasting cravings! This is bull!
It gets to the point where I just don't want to do anything at all and all I do is sit around and feel depressed about how terrible life is to quit smoking. So now I start trying to make justifications. In my head I think... well, If all I can do is think about smoking then I will never get anything done, so, maybe I will just go and buy one pack so that I can just "get it over with" and do all the stuff I've been putting off. Thats where Im at right this minute, on the verge of buying that pack. I am sooooo tired of thinking about smoking that I just want to do it and get it over with, but then what about next weekend?? If I do it this weekend, whats to stop me from doing it next weekend? nothing. If I really thought I could just go and buy one more pack, I'd do it, but deep down I REALLY DO WANT TO QUIT and I fear I will just start right back up.
Since quit, I have not cheated once. Two entire months and these cravings (especially on Friday nights) are still every bit as powerful as they were during my first week. How long is it going to take? 3 months? 6 months? EVER?? I would rather be dead (or on my way to it) than feel like this all the time.
Here's another justification, I feel that if I were to go buy a pack and then smoke in moderation (2 or 3 a day), then now I control my addiction, which in turn would make me feel like I have control over my conscious activities and decisions, which ultimately would make me feel a lot better about myself in general. If I could just smoke the "good ones" life would be wonderful.
It gets to the point where I just don't want to do anything at all and all I do is sit around and feel depressed about how terrible life is to quit smoking. So now I start trying to make justifications. In my head I think... well, If all I can do is think about smoking then I will never get anything done, so, maybe I will just go and buy one pack so that I can just "get it over with" and do all the stuff I've been putting off. Thats where Im at right this minute, on the verge of buying that pack. I am sooooo tired of thinking about smoking that I just want to do it and get it over with, but then what about next weekend?? If I do it this weekend, whats to stop me from doing it next weekend? nothing. If I really thought I could just go and buy one more pack, I'd do it, but deep down I REALLY DO WANT TO QUIT and I fear I will just start right back up.
Since quit, I have not cheated once. Two entire months and these cravings (especially on Friday nights) are still every bit as powerful as they were during my first week. How long is it going to take? 3 months? 6 months? EVER?? I would rather be dead (or on my way to it) than feel like this all the time.
Here's another justification, I feel that if I were to go buy a pack and then smoke in moderation (2 or 3 a day), then now I control my addiction, which in turn would make me feel like I have control over my conscious activities and decisions, which ultimately would make me feel a lot better about myself in general. If I could just smoke the "good ones" life would be wonderful.

