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Feb 8 04 1:32 PM
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Feb 8 04 1:39 PM
I deleted a question above that had nothing to do with relapsing which is what this string is about and that basically fit into the category of The Teaching of Conventional Wisdom at Freedom that was already attached to this string. The kind of question that said something to the effect that, "I read somewhere that this specific diet helps this specific problem." You can read lots of things in lots of places and we can spend a lot of time verifying or debunking facts from fiction on lots of different topics. Fortunately, we don't do any of that here at Freedom. Our focus is in smoking cessation and only on smoking cessation. The string Giving and getting medical advice online and Diversions in support groups covers why posts like this that are not centered on smoking cessation issues don't belong at Freedom and will likely be deleted.
Feb 8 04 6:28 PM
Feb 8 04 9:28 PM
Hello David:
We have no problem with our members learning from each other's past relapses. We are just making it impossible for them to learn from the future relapse of any member. You are right that other programs recognize that relapses happen to people with drug addictions. We know people relapse too. We just don't see it as a natural or more importantly, an inevitable event. Our post Is Relapse a Natural Part of the Addiction Process? addresses this concept. Here is our comment from that string that points out that we are coming from a different slant on this issue.
Most other boards, and in fact most professional programs and nicotine addiction experts see relapsing as a normal part of the addiction process. In a way we are out on a limb here at Freedom. We don't accept relapse as a normal process of addiction. We see a relapse as a natural process of not understanding and/or accepting ones own addiction. For if the true implication of a relapse is understood, any sane and recovering addict would choose not to relapse.
Every recovering nicotine addict here has the tools in place not to relapse, which is why he or she is a recovering addict now and not an active user. He or she understands full well, up to this point in time that he or she could not control quantity of cigarettes or duration of the relapse. If nicotine is readministered, the relapse will take on a life of its own, and has the full potential of taking your life in the process.
If you keep that understanding and keep in practice our one simple principle, a relapse is not going to be a natural occurrence and in fact, a relapse is going to be an impossibility. For as long as you follow one simple principal, you will never be able to go back to smoking. The principle, is just remembering if you want to keep control of your addiction never take another puff!
Feb 9 04 12:49 AM
Feb 9 04 5:34 AM
Feb 9 04 9:22 AM
Feb 10 04 5:57 PM
I just deleted a post and ended the membership of a person who had joined at the beginning of January and yet was still smoking when going out for drinks. The person said that he or she had not posted because he or she was smoking but now that he or she was finally off for over 72 hours he or she thought she could join right in.
We are very happy that the person has finally quit smoking and we hope that the person continues to read here and at WhyQuit.com and continues to find us a valuable resource. Unfortunately the person did not understand the relapse policy we have in place here at Freedom. We want this message to be clear and understood by all.
If a person takes a puff on a cigarette, or administers nicotine via any NRT source at any time after joining, that person did two things. First, the person threw away that particular quit. This is something that he or she may be able to get back. The person may quit again immediately, or it may take days, months or maybe even years. What also may happen though is that the person may never get the strength, desire or opportunity to quit again. Smoking may go on to take the person's health and ultimately the person's life. This is not a rare and unlikely outcome. It happens to millions of people every year.
The second thing that is done when a person takes a puff or administers nicotine and lets us know about it is that they permanently lose posting privileges. While we can't predict if a person who relapses will ever quit again, we can predict that the person will not be able to post again. This is totally non-negotiable and non-debatable.
Again, as stated above, the primary benefactor of this policy is each and every member himself or herself. We have made it very easy for each and every member to have a clearly defined spelled out battle line. No longer does a person have the luxury of thinking, "Well if I relapse, I'll go to Freedom and quit again." We have in effect destroyed what to some people can be a very persuasive argument supporting a kind of junkie thinking.
For the majority of people here this policy poses no threat and makes the each and every members mission here that much more clearly defined. It was what their intent was the day they first signed up to Freedom. To stay a member of Freedom, and more important, to keep the health and life saving benefits of staying a successful ex-smoker is as simple now as just remembering to stay totally committed to never take another puff!
Feb 10 04 9:50 PM
Feb 10 04 10:21 PM
Feb 10 04 11:22 PM
Feb 10 04 11:39 PM
Your Recovery is Not Dependent Upon Posting We encourage every member to be careful about thinking that your recovery is somehow dependent upon anything but "you" continuing to remain nicotine free. No one's recovery is contingent upon having electricity in their house, a working computer, access to the internet, or posting privileges here at Freedom or anywhere else for that matter, as is clearly evidenced by the one billion comfortable ex-smokers out there who quit without participation in any formal program. What each of their recoveries were contingent upon was getting to that day when they stopped putting all nicotine into their body. Yes, Freedom is a wonderful recovery tool but please don't allow it to become a crutch. If your computer crashes today you'll be just fine so long as nicotine doesn't find its way into your brain.
Mar 24 04 11:32 PM
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