I always knew cigarettes are bad. My Grandma died of pneumonia, caused by her Lung Cancer. I believe she also had
Emphysema but I can't be sure. I was only 11 or 12 when she was diagnosed and about 14 when she died.
I remember when I was little, I used to tell my Dad he shouldn't smoke cause he'd die from it. I distinctly
remember him screaming at me to shut up. It's funny how angry we can get defending our addictions, trying to rationalize what we do to ourselves.
Like I said, I knew that cigarettes kill and yet I started smoking at the age of 13. I am now 22. I remember promising
myself that I would quit at 16, then it was 18, and finally 21. I did quit for a month and a half right before my 21st birthday. However, those bars were far
too tempting and after going to the bars for a week or two just to get drunk so I'd have a good excuse to smoke, I knew I was hooked again.
I didn't bother trying to quit again for awhile and then I made it about 2 days. I couldn't take it so I started
up again. And now here I am, a little past 72 hrs in. It's tough, especially when you really want that ONE.
You know, whyquit.com saved my life. If I didn't have the resources to read on the site, I don't think I would
have made it the last few days. I looked at the pictures, read the stories and I realized something extremely important. I am a drug addict. No one tells you
growing up that Nicotine is a terribly addictive DRUG. They just say, "Hey kids, cigarettes are bad for you and they make your
teeth yellow". No one says, "Hey kids, cigarettes are ADDICTIVE and once you're hooked, you'll always be
hooked."
I never realized that I was signing my life away to cancer in a tube. Really....I was allowing this drug
to completely dictate to me when I was going to smoke, how much, how long, and I was allowing it to give me reasons why it was ok. "Oh, it calms me
down"..."I won't die from anything tobacco related for at least 50 years so it's ok because I'll be ready to die then anyway".
Yep, I actually told myself that last excuse all the time, rationalizing that evening if it killed me, it wouldn't matter because by then, I'd be too
old to care. Did anyone else think that? But you know...that's a bad way to go. I don't care if I'm 105 years old. I never want
to die that way. I hope no one else will either.
Whyquit.com forced me to see the truth. The one thing that gets me over my craves is to repeat the information I found on
the site to anyone who will listen. I repeat fact after fact after fact until I am so angry, I just want to cry. It saddens me so much that the government
allows such poison and all they can think to put on the damn box is, "This MAY cause Lung Cancer, this MAY cause low birth weight in pregnant
women". How about putting pictures of people on the boxes dying of lung cancer and listing at least 10 cancer causing ingredients? I doubt that would
help, though.
I'm sorry this is so long. I'll end this now.
=^^= Kat =^^=

